Last week, we discussed how the Harsh Inner Critic can develop when the basic needs of children are not met. The last post looked specifically at four of those needs: place, attachment, nurture and attachment. Now, we will address the other four basic needs of children: support, structure, respect and emotional boundaries.
Basic Needs of Children, Part 1
You may wonder why there are times when you become upset, seemingly “out of the blue.” Or why the Harsh Inner Critic chimes in to blast you unexpectedly. At times, the explanation can be found by examining how your basic needs were not met as a baby and/or as a child.
These unmet needs lie dormant in your unconscious mind, and can be activated by events or interactions with others.
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6 Things I Learned From Being Left at the Train Station
When we travel, my husband and I have a plan in case we get separated: the one left behind stays where they are and the other comes back to find them. We have this plan because we do a lot of train and subway travel and do not have cell phones. We have never had to use our plan, until our last vacation.
After 18 hours of travel, we were boarding out last train of that trip. It was chaotic, and one of our bags got misplaced. It contained all our photography equipment and a computer. For us, a big part of vacation is the joy of taking photos. Continue reading
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11 Ways to Distract Yourself From the Harsh Inner Critic
It may feel like there is no way to get out from under the control of the Harsh Inner Critic. The messages are so powerful and feel so true. The good news is that with time, practice and support you can develop the skill to be in charge of your thoughts and how you respond to them. This is not to say you can have absolute control, rather it is the ability to not believe everything you hear inside and, therefore, be able to make choices.
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6 Steps to Overcoming the Harsh Inner Critic
We spend a lot of time on this blog talking about the Harsh Inner Critic, how it developed, and the role it plays in your life. It is important to remember that it is usually not right. You can build skills to find relief from its influence. Your life does not have to be controlled by these painful, critical messages.
You are not going to be able to banish or destroy these messages. However, you can learn to not allow them to dictate your moods or run your life.
