Don’t take your love away from me
Don’t you leave my heart in misery
If you go then I’ll be blue
‘Cause breaking up is hard to do
In 1962, Neil Sedaka’s song “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do” became a huge hit, especially among people going through a breakup and the angst that follows. They could identify with misery and the blues.
Time has shown that he not only hit the mark during the 60’s, but in every generation since. This song has been covered and re-released frequently in the last 53 years.
Have you ever had a week, day or weekend like this: extra meetings, extra activities and a weekend trip to plan? You keep thinking you will get that piece of work that is due, done after you finish this one task. Unfortunately, “after” did not happen.
That is the kind of week I was having so I decided that I would write this week’s blog article during the weekend. As I was packing for my trip, I realized I had my computer but no power cord. I remained calm with myself and made a plan to stop by the office and get the cord on the way out-of-town. I picked up the cord the next day.
Saturday afternoon, between brunch and the evening’s event, I had time to write the article. I pulled the computer out and the cord was not in the case. I assume it was in another bag. After an exhaustive search of every bag and a trip outside to search the car, the cord was nowhere to be found.
When Albert Einstein met Charlie Chaplin, Einstein said,“What I most admire about your art, is your universality. You don’t say a word, yet the world understands you!”
Silent film star Charlie Chaplin epitomizes the power of nonverbal communication. Think about it for a moment: he mastered the use of facial expressions and body language to convey messages in a medium where words were not an option. He did so to such a degree that in 1998 – well into the age when words, music, and CGI could tell the story in the movies – film critic Andrew Sarris called Chaplin “arguably the single most important artist produced by the cinema, certainly its most extraordinary performer and probably still its most universal icon”.
Chaplin can help us understand what we were talking about last week: the importance of showing up. When you show up there will be a language spoken, even if words are not. As in Chaplin’s day, it will be the language of your body. Experiences and feelings are expressed by your movements, your posture, your silence, and your stillness. Continue reading
“I’m going to be voted off the island,” she wailed. Most of us know she is referring to the TV show, “Survivor.” On the show, team members are made to leave when they do not live up to expectations, or are seen as a threat by the other contestants. No matter the reason, a line was crossed, intentionally or unintentionally, and the situation could not be fixed. The contestant had done something wrong, and the mistake was large enough that they would not get a second chance.
We have all heard the saying, “It hurt too much to cry.” What you don’t hear as often is the idea that there could exist a pain so great that to talk about it seems unbearable. It is the feeling that the act of verbalizing an experience would cause such hopelessness and shame it would be impossible to endure it.
That begs the question: Isn’t therapy based on talking? If talking is too painful and therapy is about talking, what do you when you have this type of pain inside?
