Do you spend time thinking about how to make friends and how to get others to like you? Do you think about how to like yourself, or even how to be your own best friend?

When you like yourself, then the Harsh Inner Critic has less power over how you feel. You have more strength to fight back against the negative messages we all have inside. When you feel like a good friend to yourself, then you can recognize when the Internal Drama starts. Being your own best friend makes it possible to turn the negative thoughts and beliefs into the positive. This will increase your happiness.

Techniques to increase your happiness.

The same techniques that can be used to make others like you can be used to help you learn to like yourself.

Take one suggestion at a time and concentrate on that one behavior before moving to the next. You are an individual; discover the suggestions that will work for you. Learning to like yourself is a skill you can increase with time and effort.

• Smile. It actually takes more muscles to frown than to smile. Using your body differently will cause you to be more aware of yourself.
• Be easily impressed, entertained and interested. Wow yourself. At times, it takes a conscious commitment and effort to be interested in things. Think about one thing you have enjoyed in the past. Look at the elements that made up that activity and find what subjects or activities would have those elements in them. Try new things. If you find it hard, ask friends for suggestions that interest them.
• What you say about yourself shapes your self-image and how you feel about yourself. Concentrate on catching yourself doing things that are positive. Make a mental note for future reference. Learn to make positive statements about yourself.
• Talk to your self about what you like in others. When you fill your mind with positive thoughts, it creates a positive atmosphere in which to live. As you create positive experiences, you will feel like a person of worth.
• Stop taking yourself so seriously. Learn to find humor in your thoughts and actions. There is something to learn in every situation. When you are not critical of yourself, you can be open to finding the opportunity to learn and grow.

A step toward happiness

These suggestions may sound like you would be behaving in a fake way. It is not about being fake, but about trying on new ways of thinking and behaving. There is a saying in Alcoholics Anonymous: “Fake it until you make it.” The people who have followed this suggestion have found it actually works.

If you find yourself with struggling to like yourself, I can help. Call Katherine at (919)608-1797.